Unwritten Rules of the South, according to a "Belle"

It has occurred to me this summer that there aren't too many folks from Charleston these days. In fact, most of the people I meet on a daily basis at work or elsewhere are from somewhere up north and on occasion, Florida. I pride myself that my family is from Charleston; I was born and raised here (with a minor move to Walterboro in between). Even if you don't ask people where they are from, you instantly know by the way they carry themselves and act in different scenarios. There are certain rules in the South, unwritten rules that separate those who move to the South and those who were raised here.


For example, last summer Adam and I attended a Hootie & the Blowfish concert that was sold out. We had incredible seats, but unfortunately our seated neighbors were yelling profanity, had gelled hair, the men were wearing thick gold necklaces; the women they were with were dressed for the "club", neckline down to there, hemline up to here. I instantly knew they were not from around here.

As a Southern Belle myself, I know most of the rules that aren't said, but should be known. Being southern isn't ALL about drinking sweet tea, but Lord knows it doesn't hurt! Hell, half of the stuff down here is "sweet tea" flavored, we've dedicated a vodka to it and I'm pretty sure if some people could get it intravenously, they would.


Southern women are a different breed. We are taught at a very young age that you do NOT leave the house without making sure your hair looks good, makeup is touched up - including lipstick, and for Pete's sake put your pearls on if your outfit calls for it! Don't wear white shoes after Labor Day (I don't care WHO says its ok, it is not). Your nails should be neatly manicured and classic. Southern women should command respect from all men, doors will be opened, dinner checks will be paid, and don't expect a southern belle to call you...a man should call her first.

These are all the rules we already know... they've been instilled in us since we were born. But what about a modern day Belle? We have to put up with this new stuff in the internet age.
- It is unacceptable for a man to text message you to ask you out, he should call you.

- Furthermore, no one should be calling your home before 9am or after 9pm, it is completely inappropriate (unless of course, there is an emergency or a time zone difference). Anyone calling you after midnight isn't someone you should be responding with.

- Emails?! No. What happened to hand written thank you letters, snail mail and care packages?

- And what is with women letting their children dress like they are 25 years old?! I literally saw a girl in the mall with her mother begging to get these little high-heeled booties and she was wearing a *gasp* shirt that showed her belly! I'm not saying put them in a "romper" that my mother forced me to wear, but a little skirt and cute top will work just fine!


I'm not saying there is anything wrong with being from the North. I love the NY Yankees more than I can say and I WILL make it to New York one day to visit. It does sadden me, however, that things are starting to shift and change in our culture. Gone are the days where mothers give their daughters a copy of "Are you there God, its Me Margaret?" by Judy Blume to explain the "birds and the bees" (ps, this is a topic I need to go into further, but on a different blog. my mom actually DID buy me this to explain what getting a "cycle" was all about).
Everyone is in a rush now to get everywhere, when we used to take our time. My neighbors don't take pride in their lawns, women allow men to booty call them at all hours of the night, kids don't run around catching fireflies in jars and people don't sit on their front porches anymore. It saddens me.


Ok, I'm done. If you need more advice, watch the movie, "Shag".

Things I Heart, and things I don't.

I Heart: Adam, my Family, God, Beau. Watermelon on a hot summer's day, anything Matchbox Twenty or Rob Thomas, the color pink (hot, baby or otherwise), beach music, candles that smell like buttercream, large floppy hats, any holiday, sugar cookies, getting mail/packages, "You've Got Mail", sunlight in the morning waking me up, America's Next Top Model marathons, flying, dancing around the house, singing, the feel of velvet, a good pair of broken in jeans, going to the movies, dressing up, taking pictures, the smell of bacon, any breakfast food and a good cup of coffee, Charleston, sushi, Boone, a sense of accomplishment, friends you can count on, stationary, anything monogrammed, crab legs (or anything dipped in butter), shopping and fashion, a clean house, purses and shoes, spray tan, the smell of banana boat sunscreen, Appalachian State University, silly jokes, reading a good book all day long, homemade mix cds, watching the sunset on Mallory Square in Key West, short road trips with Adam, lazy Sundays, and of course, writing!




Things I don't heart: toilets that flush automatically (I'll flush when I'm good and ready, thank you!), Crohn's Disease, rude people, friends you can't count on, ever!, hard rap, marching band music, and heavy metal, spiders/snakes, brides who turn crazy...or their mom's who make me want to scream, eating at a high priced restaurant that ends up having crappy food, having to take 12 pills a day for the rest of my life, the smell of clean linen room spray, telemarketers, Kristen Dunst, thunderstorms, chipped nail polish, flat hair, the sound of Styrofoam being scrapped by a spoon, cantelope, people who smack their food, sunburns, long car rides over 5 hours, when people say, "alls I gotta do", Atlanta, driving downtown Charleston, tequila, scary movies, chainsaws, jelly fish, tomatoes, selfish & immature people, bad customer service.